I was close to tears before I took the stand. All I could think to myself was, “Don’t cry! Whatever you do don’t cry or they’ll think you don’t want to do this.”
There was something about the formality of requesting guardianship of our daughter that made it so serious and somber. In reality nothing was going to change. My husband and I would continue to do the things we’ve done for Dani since the day she was born, but in order to continue, we had to appear before a judge and ask for permission.
I took the stand first and was nervous as a cat. Raising my right hand I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth…so help me God, then sat down behind the microphone and explained our case. With relative ease the judge confirmed Dani’s need for a guardian and soon we were on our way home, continuing as before.
Today felt like the halfway mark in our lives. While other parents our age are visiting colleges, planning marriages for their children, and even awaiting grandchildren, we acquire guardianship and prepare a will. Instead of pricing dorms, we contemplate caregivers, adult care facilities, and co-guardians. I never dreamt in my late forties these would be my main concerns, but they are and they weigh heavy on my mind.
I’d be worried sick if it weren’t for the knowledge that God has a plan. Psalms 72:4 assures me that God defends the weak and needy, and I trust this truth with all my heart. Our God has a great love toward all who love Him and His faith endures forever. (Psalms 117) He will not forget or neglect our little girl a single day of her life, and this gives me tremendous peace and comfort as I enter into the latter half of my life.
I don’t know what decisions you face today with your child. They may be as joyful as waiting for that special grandchild, or as painful as a terminal disease. Whatever they are, trust in God’s plan for your child. Never worry or fret, instead turn to Him and pray!
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6
Visit Nancy's Website: Olive Leaf Ministries
1 comment:
Oh Nancy! forgive me for I am shedding LOTS AND LOTS of tears over your words! No - I can't imagine what it must be like to make this sort of arrangements for your own child-- and my heart is breaking into a gazillion pieces to read of your daily struggles and your deep, deep pain. I am equally amazed at your sense of peace and your TRULY GREAT FAITH in our Lord --- I have SOOO MANY LESSONS yet to learn in my relatively new walk with the Lord and you, Nancy, are a true and solid inspiration to me. I lift you and each member of your beautiful family up in prayer.
in His Grace!!
mariacristina
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