December 24, 2009
He was with God in the beginning.
Through him all things were made;
without him nothing was made that has been made.
In him was life, and that life was the light of men.
December 20, 2009
Ecclesi gets this treatment each day or maybe every third day if he's stable. He loves it so much that as I prepared these supplies to take this picture he begged me to swab his ear. (His ear looked great but he got a "treatment" anyway.)
December 16, 2009
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me,
and do not hinder them,
for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
December 12, 2009
December 9, 2009
Jimmy had just bought this new hat but before he could put it on his beautiful bald head, Dani got a bee in her bonnet to wear it first. It was well worth the purchase just to capture her smile.
November 30, 2009
November 26, 2009
November 20, 2009
November 14, 2009
November 9, 2009
Making my way across the hospital cafeteria bustling with healthcare workers finishing their lunch, I was fast approaching the last few directions on my crinkled sheet of paper. The instructions had done well to guide me into the main lobby of the huge facility, left down a tight, dark, and busy corridor, a zig zagg right to the “orange” elevators, and down to level B. Once off the carrot colored lift, I was aimed to the right and then left across the cafeteria to a meeting room where I had full intentions of being prompt, present, and ready for CPR class.
Opening the door to the classroom I half expected a room full of doctors conducting a work-lunch, but was pleased to see I had indeed arrived in the right place. Sitting around tables assembled in a “U” fashion, I saw four fellow students waiting by their CPR adult and infant dummies. There seemed to be plenty of dummies to go around so I knew I’d made good time.
Upon entering the room the first thing I saw was a sign-in sheet and handouts. The dog-eared corners of the handouts were a dead giveaway they were not ours to keep. They had been used before and would be used again, so we’d be asked to hand them in at the end of class. After signing in I reached for a hand out and noticed the one on the top of the stack had the name “Kim” written in ink on the upper right corner. In one easy motion I slid it to the side and took the nameless one underneath. Interestingly enough the guy behind me did the same thing.
I love watching human behavior. It never ceases to amaze me as I try to figure out why we do the things we do. I am convinced that even though some of our actions may be bizarre and unexplainable, we all do what we do for a reason. It may not necessarily be a good reason, but it’s a reason that motivates us just the same. In this case I find it fascinating that I instinctively didn’t want the handout with Kim’s name on it and I’d wager to guess the CPR students before me slid her aside as well. The question is why? What’s wrong with using a handout that has someone else’s name on it? It was the same life-saving information, yet I shunned it as if it were substandard material. I even knew I’d be handing it in at the end of class, yet still selected a non-named sheet.
I found this observation so fascinating I ran an experiment on the ladies of the Sunday school class I co-teach. I was planning to share this story about Kim’s unwanted paper so I wrote the name Kim on the top right corner of one handout. Placing it on top of the stack I handed out the outlines. As I told the story three ladies on the back row began to snicker. Knowing they’d had an encounter with Kim I asked them to explain. Confessing and confirming what I had expected, I learned that just like the students in my CPR class, they had rejected the named outline too. The lady who ended up with it took it only because it was the last sheet and she crossed out Kim, replacing it with her own name. Oh don’t you just love it?
After working years in women’s ministry if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that no one wants a mistake in their identity. Women want their nametags correct and will let you know one way or another. Some come right out and tell you so you’ll get it right the next time, while others simply conduct their own spell check by using a Sharpie Marker to correct the error. Accepting our name misspelled simply goes against our grain. Why? Because we are unique creatures of God. Handmade in His image we are one of a kind. That's why we go to great lengths to protect our uniqueness.
There is another with a name like no other. He is Jesus Christ the Son of the Living God. No one goes to the Father but by Him and He is the Light of the world! He created us, He died for us, and He loves us. Take the time to praise His Holy Name today. We owe Him our lives.
"On his robe and on his thigh he has this name written:
KING OD KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS."
November 5, 2009
October 28, 2009
We went to a nearby lake that has the most breathtaking trees this time of year. While taking pictures, three other people stopped with their cameras to capture the beauty as well. I couldn't help but notice that each admirer was in their 60's or 70's prompting me to think how many years they must have already seen fall's beautiful display (unless of course they were new to Kansas City...which makes me wonder why so "seasoned" folks are moving to Missouri...but that's another story.)
"The heavens declare the glory of God;
the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
Day after day they pour forth speech;
night after night they display knowledge."
October 25, 2009
October 19, 2009
Well, lo and behold, their names were announced and they won the baker's dozen. Since sugar gives me gargantuan headaches, I picked up the donuts today and distributed them among family. I gave my brother and his family five sugar bombs and our skinny minny dad, who can eat anything and not gain an ounce, four carbohydrate wheels. My sister declined to participate since she handles sugar more poorly than me, which left four thinly glazed treats for the birthday boys who won them in the first place.
It's been a good day giving donuts and getting a giraffe. We hope you are having a good day too!
October 16, 2009
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30
I AM YOUR CHILD AND I NEED YOU BADLY.
Please look at me carefully the next time you see me.
Please notice that I am small and weak.
Please listen to me carefully the next time you see me.
Please notice that I don't know much.
Like you, I was born helpless. I'm still growing up so taking
care of myself will take me a long time.
I need food.
I need rest.
I need to be kept clean
I need to be kept warm in winter and cool in summer.
I need to be taken in your arms or sat on your lap.
I need to feel your skin against my skin.
I need you to help heal my hurts.
I need you to play with me just so you and I can have some good times together.
I need you to teach me everything you can so I'll have a chance in this world when I grow up.
I need your patience. I know I'm not very orderly. I cry out for things like food and attention the second I need them. I can't help it and I know that bothers you sometimes. All I can hope is that you will be patient with me until I can learn to be patient, too.
Above all, I need to know you love me.
I need so much from you, yet I have only one thing I can give you in return.
That is my love.
Today and tomorrow and as long as I live.
Today as I read your post, I was so humbled, and as I often am, brought to tears by the simple truth of God's great mercy and love though the eyes of one seemingly born for affliction. I do not claim to understand in its entirety why God chooses to allow this, but I have seen Him do it with my own motherly eyes. As you know, in I Corinthians 1:27 Paul said that God would use the simple and weak things of this world to shame the wise & the strong. In our world my child's and possibly even more so your child's life would be considered a waste and further evidence of a cruel God that stands afar and watches sadistically as suffering takes place. But, often it is in watching those sweet innocent faces behold the majesty and awesomeness of their Creator, the strongest and the wisest are brought to their knees. For it is impossible to deny God's power in the face of one so weak brought to tears in reverence of the One that holds her firmly in His grasp. In many ways the Danis and Grants of this world are the lucky ones, for I believe because of their life of affliction, get to behold the glory of God on this earth in ways that many of us cannot fathom.
God bless you, my friend. You and your sweet Dani are frequently mentioned in the prayers of this house. May God continue to use her to bring honor and glory to His name!
Much love, Emily
October 12, 2009
- Fritos (bottom)
- Chili (thick to keep the Fritos crisp)
- Melted spicy Velveeta cheese
- Dollop of sour cream on top
October 8, 2009
October 1, 2009
September 25, 2009
I've been looking for winter shoes and ordered these four beauties. I'm sad to say none of them will work for one reason or another, but no despair, I'll simply print off a return label and send them back. I have two more pairs arriving today, so all is not lost. Oh, and did I tell you they deliver within 24-48 hours. Oh...wait a sec...I hear the door bell. Yes! It's my shoes. Ta ta.
September 21, 2009
- Rotary dial phones. Loved the phone numbers that were full of 9's and 0's.
- Jaw breakers the size of baseballs. I'd take my oversized treat, place it in a kitchen towel, grab a hammer, and smash it into bite sized bits. I'd be gone by dusk.
- Lushy chocolate malts.
- Manual typewriters in high school and layers of carbon paper.
- Ditto machines that printed in lavender and had a weird indescribable smell when fresh off the roller.
- When children were the remote control.
- How movies like Frankenstein, Mummy, and Wolf man were extra spooking in black and white.
- Replacing T.V. tubes.
- Dialing "O" for the operator to make a long distance phone call.
- Cars without A/C, power steering, power windows, or power brakes. Driving to the store was a workout.
- Crawling in the engine compartment to work on a car. This is Jimmy's. I only crawled under cars to retrieve a ball or frisbee.
- AM radio only. You knew a storm was coming when it got all staticy.
- When gas was 29 cents/gallon.
- When filling station pump dials only went up to 99 cents. As gas prices exceeded 99 cents/gallon, the price had to be cut in half and when it was time to pay, the price was doubled. Now that was confusing.
- 8-track tapes. Never like them.
- 45 records and their colorful adaptors.
- Defrosting the ice box with pans of boiling water. Once defrosted we'd use every towel the kitchen had to offer soaking up the wet mess.
- Cold aluminum ice trays that stuck to your hand when you pulled the lever to release the ice.
- Full meals were served on airplanes.
- When there was no Tylenol, only Aspirin.
- The first home hair dryer that consisted of a plastic cap with a vacuum-type hose leading to the machine. There were also hard fold down dryers like in the beauty shops.
- When the first hand held hair dryer came out to replace the plastic cap. Mine was light blue, I got it for Christmas, and it was handier than a pocket on a shirt.
- When hot rollers replaced pink sponge rollers.
- Stamps were 5 cents.
- When cheese slices were peeled apart not individually wrapped.
- Wax lips.
- Penny candy.
- Sea monkeys.
- When JFK was shot. I was four years old and it seemed as if the world stood still.
- When Elvis Presley died. My family was on vacation on Padre Island. I was sitting on the hotel deck looking out at the ocean when my dad came out and told me the news.
September 18, 2009
September 14, 2009
September 12, 2009
September 5, 2009
September 1, 2009
I stood at the counter waiting for my hamburger and tater tots to be cooked. It took a few minutes because they're made fresh. As a result they are delicious as can be. I watched as the chef and his assistant took orders, gathered the ingredients, and prepared the plates for each customer. Suddenly, like a couple of dusty tornatos, two older ladies approached the counter. (If they knew I was writing this they'd kill me.)
August 29, 2009
by Stuart Townend
How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure
How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory
Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that helf Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I knoww that it is finished
I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast inJesus Christ
His death and resurrection
Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom
August 22, 2009
BLOGGING? A GOOD IDEA?
My name is Zach Bieghler and I’m a paramedic in the State of Kansas. I have served with various EMS agencies in South Central Kansas as well as for an educational institution. I’ve been a paramedic since September of 2005 and in EMS since 2002. I’ve spent the last six years of my life dedicated to EMS, working as much as I could, between multiple EMS jobs to gain knowledge and experience. Life was good. I had recently become established enough to buy my first home in the town of which I served. I was taking various EMS courses to be a better instructor for my students of which I taught. Life as it seemed was on the right track I hoped and dreamed for. Unfortunately, that dream came to a sudden stop, which came by no one else’s fault but my own.
In April of 2007 my EMS partner and I were called out for an inter-facility transfer. The patient had several medical complications, in addition to being severely obese. Several hours after the call and when the report was finished, I sat down at the computer, while on the clock mind you, and entered Myspace.com. There I started a “blog” which I wrote about the call I had just ran hours before. Out of respect for my previous employer, I’m not going to discuss what I had written in the blog, but to say ashamedly, it was vulgar and offensive and related to the patient’s level of obesity.
I had written the blog for my friends to see only, most of which are in the EMS profession. I later discovered that I did not have settings adequate on Myspace.com to prevent the general public from viewing. I wrote the blog to share my experiences and to make them laugh. As a healthcare provider, we all must be empathetic and sympathetic towards all patients regardless of the situation. As I wrote this blog, my empathy for this patient was absent. I didn’t think about the anger, humility, and mistrust that could have manifested by the patient towards me, my agency or my profession. Not to mention a legal preceding that could have been initiated by the patient that could have damaged my agencies trust and reputation. This will present a tough, but extremely important lesson to learn as time goes by.
After I had written the blog, time went by as usual. As months went by I had actually forgot that I had written the blog. I had actually cared for this patient two more times since the blog for various reasons. As I continued caring for him I grew to like the patient. I remember one time as I entered his residence he greeted me by first name with a smile. You have developed a special bond with a patient when they remember you by name and you remember them. At this point, I would have deleted the blog from my site, but as I said, I had forgotten all about it.
In September of 2007, a co-worker reported the blog to my employer. This initiated a meeting between my Director, hospital Vice President and my agencies attorney. While participating in a mass casualty drill I was pulled away and escorted to the Vice President’s office. I knew it had to be a significant matter to pull me away from such a training exercise. Completely oblivious as to what was going on, I found myself in the office with the Vice President of Operations and the Director of EMS. I was immediately confronted with the blog that I had written. I had a rush of emotions, the most powering being sorrow for what I had done. I was instructed not to talk about it, delete all work related blogs immediately and was given a 30 day unpaid suspension. My Director also told me that he would more than likely be reporting the incident to the Kansas Board of EMS.
In a state of complete devastation I arrived home and immediately logged onto Myspace.com and deleted every blog I had ever written. I found out that evening that two of my co-workers had also been suspended 30 days without pay because of my personal blog and their return comments. I’m the author and they got suspended as well! I had never lived with such guilt in my life as I felt then. So guilt ridden in fact, that I lost 10 lbs over the next few days.
I continued to work for the educational institution during time I was suspended. After a week of my suspension, the Dean of Instruction at the educational institution received a letter accompanied by a copy of my blog. Now, this blog not only caused my problems at my EMS service, but my secondary job as well. This resulted in a very stern meeting between me and the EMS Program Director. The Program Director is my mentor and I had really let him down. Not only did I let him down, I let down the entire staff and students at the educational institution. The guilt and disappointment in me was starting to become unbearable. Serving a thirty day suspension from my career and my primary source of income took its toll. I had to completely drain all of my savings to stay afloat. All of this resulted because of my poor choice of judgment. I soon found that things were just starting.
I returned to work after my suspension and found myself working with those extremely disappointed in me. After a couple of days and a few talks with co-workers, things only improved by a little. I will never get that full respect back that I had prior to the incident and I wouldn’t ask for it either. What I did was wrong and hard for anyone to forgive. Still guilt-ridden and disappointed beyond words, I found myself having difficulty coping with what I had done and fell into a deep depression.
February of 2008 rolled around; I was enrolled in an Instructor Coordinator class to further my education and passion to teach. I found that my Director did in fact report the incident to the Kansas Board of EMS. The Board’s Investigations Committee was meeting in just days. I had contacted the Board and confirmed the news and was told that a decision would be made at the meeting later that week. The week passed slowly by as I waited in horror. Friday came and I contacted the Board office. I found that a decision had been made to revoke my Paramedic certification. My world was soon spiraling out of control.
As one could imagine, the process to revoke a license is not a quick and painless process. The process took months. Not knowing when my license would be revoked and trying to concentrate on my career was painstaking. One of the hardest things to complete was my Instructor Coordinator class, uncertain of my careers future path.
I had finally started to build my savings back up and was advised to seek an attorney. This was another financial hit from my original mistake. I hired an attorney to help me through the revocation process. A total of nine months passed since my original suspension. Nine months of guilt, anguish, disappointment and depression, I finally received a consent agreement. Given the options and willing to accept my mistake and consequences of my action, I signed the consent agreement. This agreement listed several things, to summarize, I was being revoked for no less than 90 days for professional misconduct emphasizing on a possible violation of patient confidentiality.
Consequently, I resigned as a paramedic for the service I worked for and had to quit teaching, which is something I’m very passionate about. I had to take a job as a vendor merchandiser, stocking shelves in grocery stores. Working alone everyday gave me a lot of time to think about what I had really done and who I had disappointed. Having resigned from the EMS agency and not being able to teach, I roughly took a 60% pay cut. Once again, the financial burden, for my moment of poor judgment, continually hung over my head. During this time I relied very heavily on my family, friends and mentors. As I relied on them, they too suffered, feeling the ups and downs of the process. Also during this time I sought counseling for my actions from a mental health hospital. Having completed the counseling I learned more about empathy and it’s importance. It instilled in me the importance of patient confidentiality as I found myself as a patient in a mental health hospital.
After barely struggling though my 90-day period it was time to try and get reinstated. I knew that it was possible that the Board could extend my revocation or worst yet revoke my MICT indefinitely. I soon found myself sitting in front of the Investigations Committee in Topeka, in a small room, crowded with people I didn’t know. I felt alone as I really only knew three individuals there, two of which testified on my behalf. As I stood out in the hallway with the panel during deliberation, I felt sick with emotions. “What if they say no?” was all I could think of. I thought about how much effort and time (6 years) I had put into my career. For what? All for the chance to blog on Myspace.com?
The large group in the hallway filed back into the conference room as I took a seat back at the table in which I had testified at. The decision was made to reinstate my MICT! This was all I could ask for. There were two conditions that followed: 1) Write an article for the KEMSA Chronicle, which would also be published on the KSBEMS website, and 2) make myself available to any EMS agency across the State of Kansas to speak about what I had done and the consequences that followed.
Having listed the conditions stated, I want to emphasize that I’m not writing this article because I have to. I am writing this article to educate other EMS professionals. What I did was wrong and should never happen to anyone. I want people to learn from my mistake. I have heard several of my colleagues talk about calls that they had ran, some even in the same format as what I had wrote. We in EMS all have to know that “blogging” has consequences. Each and every bit of electronic postings must edify the profession, other technicians, ourselves and the patients we serve. I want my colleagues to think twice before saying or writing anything about the patients they care for. We have to be empathetic, put yourself in their shoes. Or as the hospital Vice President asked me in her office, “What if that patient was your mother, father, son or daughter”? As to the second condition listed, I would be more than happy to discuss my experience with your employees, co-workers or students. This is free of charge as required. You can schedule this by contacting me by email at email@example.com.
I would like to thank the Kansas Board of EMS for giving me the privilege and opportunity to share my experience with others. I would also like to thank KEMSA for publishing this article. Also thanks to all my family, friends, colleagues and my counselor who has supported me through this trying experience.
Thank you Zach. May the Lord restore you fully and completely.
"Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up." Psalm 71:20